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  • Caring For Your Dumpster Fire The Dow Is Over 50,000 T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex T-ShirtCaring For Your Dumpster Fire The Dow Is Over 50,000 T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex Hoodie
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    Caring For Your Dumpster Fire The Dow Is Over 50,000 T-Shirt & Hoodie

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    Investing in Irony Welcome to the latest installment of our Life Skills Series: surviving the Bondi Top. When the political elites try to deflect from systemic corruption by top-ticking the market, the only rational response is to mock the hubris. This design is a badge of honor for those who track the glitches in the…

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  • Everyone Relax The Dow Is Over 50,000 Skeleton Shredding T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex T-ShirtEveryone Relax The Dow Is Over 50,000 Skeleton Shredding T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex Hoodie
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    Everyone Relax The Dow Is Over 50,000 Skeleton Shredding T-Shirt & Hoodie

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    The Ultimate Deflection Everyone relax, right? When the powers that be try to bury the Epstein files by shouting about your 401(k), you know you’ve witnessed the ultimate political top-tick. This design immortalizes the moment the simulation glitched, perfectly capturing the dark humor of watching forced optimism collide with a spectacular crash. Design Details A…

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  • How To Top-Tick The Market Dow 50,000 Retro Teacher T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex T-ShirtHow To Top-Tick The Market Dow 50,000 Retro Teacher T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex Hoodie
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    How To Top-Tick The Market Dow 50,000 Retro Teacher T-Shirt & Hoodie

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    A Masterclass in Timing How do you create the greatest stock market sell signal in history? You ignore the tough questions and brag about 401(k)s right before the crash. This vintage-inspired piece mocks the hubris of the political elite and the inevitable glitches that follow. Wear it as a badge of financial literacy and cynical…

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  • My First Glitch Dow 50K Retro Satire T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex T-ShirtMy First Glitch Dow 50K Retro Satire T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex Hoodie
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    My First Glitch Dow 50K Retro Satire T-Shirt & Hoodie

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    Price range: $25.99 through $51.99

    The Matrix is Glitching Celebrate the greatest stock market sell signal of the decade. When politicians start bragging about your 401(k) instead of doing their jobs, you know the simulation is glitching. This “My First Glitch” design captures the exact moment the Bondi Top was called, immortalizing the political hubris that aged like milk. Design…

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  • My First Market Crash Dumpster Fire Retro T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex T-ShirtMy First Market Crash Dumpster Fire Retro T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex Hoodie
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    My First Market Crash Dumpster Fire Retro T-Shirt & Hoodie

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    Price range: $25.99 through $51.99

    Riding the Bondi Top Some call it a market correction; we call it the inevitable result of political deflections. This piece captures the pure schadenfreude of watching the “Dow 50,000” brag turn into a spectacular dumpster fire. Perfect for the finance-literate cynic who knows that when the political elite tell you to relax, it’s time…

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  • Stay Positive The Dow Is Over 50,000 Dumpster Fire T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex T-ShirtStay Positive The Dow Is Over 50,000 Dumpster Fire T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex Hoodie
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    Stay Positive The Dow Is Over 50,000 Dumpster Fire T-Shirt & Hoodie

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    Price range: $25.99 through $51.99

    This is Fine: Corporate Edition They looked straight into the camera, ignored the scandals, and yelled that the Dow is over 50,000. Exactly 50 days later, the market crashes and the hubris has aged like milk. This design is for anyone who appreciates the dark irony of forced political positivity while the entire system is…

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  • The World of Economics Everyone Relax The Dow Is Over 50,000 T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex T-ShirtThe World of Economics Everyone Relax The Dow Is Over 50,000 T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex Hoodie
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    The World of Economics Everyone Relax The Dow Is Over 50,000 T-Shirt & Hoodie

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    Price range: $25.99 through $51.99

    Economics 101: The Bondi Top Class is in session, and today’s lesson is on how politicians manage to top-tick the market with spectacular precision. When they yell about the Dow to deflect from doing their jobs, it’s the ultimate sell signal. This design is for the finance-literate internet warriors who watched the arrogance age like…

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  • The World of Science The Dow Is Over 50,000 Dumpster Fire T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex T-ShirtThe World of Science The Dow Is Over 50,000 Dumpster Fire T-Shirt & Hoodie - Unisex Hoodie
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    The World of Science The Dow Is Over 50,000 Dumpster Fire T-Shirt & Hoodie

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    Price range: $25.99 through $51.99

    The Science of a Crash It takes a special kind of chemistry to combine a massive political cover-up with a historic market top. This design celebrates the exact formula that created the most hilarious political glitch of the decade. Perfect for those who enjoy the dark schadenfreude of watching a boastful pivot turn into a…

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